Piese de Thomas Sainsbury

A Simple Procedure
It's a simple enough procedure. With a gun-like machine, a microchip will be inserted into your hand. This means there will be no more rifling around in your handbag and/or wallet for your eftpos card or passport. No sirree. It also means all those pesky terrorists, psychos, criminals, and in fact anyone undesirable, won't have access to any of our 'public' spaces. But what exactly constitutes undesirable? A Simple Procedure is a comedic dystopian tale. It begins when a brutal stabbing on the London underground throws five people's lives into disarray. And the only way to make sure this atrocious act doesn't happen again? Why, it's a simple enough procedure. A simple microchip inserted into ones hand is all one needs . . .
And then you die...
nd then you die, a black comedy, is the tale of Debbie, Josie and Max. Debbie, a compulsive binge-eater and Tony Robbins disciple wants nothing more than a hot body, a hot boyfriend, and a hot handbag. Josie, a self-titled model/actress/pop star/fashionista wants the ultimate celebrity lifestyle. And Max, a gambling addict, cruises through life painfully avoiding creditors and the casino. When everything transpires against them, including the voices yabbering in their heads, they must take drastic measures to take control.
Basement
Basement, a one-man show, is the story of Paul Thompson. Paul has spent his life avoiding his problems. He thinks he's come up with the ultimate solution for dealing with them, however, when he rents a basement for a month. His plan? To hide and hope all his responsibilities disappear forever. Three months later and he may not have the strength to leave and he's sure someone, or something, has entered his haven.
Beast
A road trip turns into a nightmare when three siblings break down in Kaitangata. The locals are strange. The food is stranger.
Camping
A hilarious comedy about two couples double-booked in a Kiwi holiday home. “It’s like a raunchier version of Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf with the serious drama cut out. Even the characters feel like grotesque Kiwi versions of Edward Albee’s counterparts.” – Nathan Joe, Theatrescenes
Cat and Mouse
A most improbable love triangle, one that appears to have only two sides. Roberto, a full-time barman and part-time musician, meets a lot of women in his line of work. When a tipsy, affection-hungry young woman called Cat slips him her phone number at closing time, he thinks little of it. Even so, there's no resisting the lure of a late night booty call. A week later, another young woman, Cleo, enters the bar. She's smart, very cynical, utterly indifferent to Roberto - and a dead ringer for Cat: same face, figure, hair and eye-colour, even an identical kiss. Are they twins? Both deny it. Is it a case of one woman with multiple personalities? A fiendish fidelity test or a cruel prank, perhaps?
Caustic
People are disappearing. Coca-City is being bombed. Rebels are within. Caustic is a dystopian tale of a world drenched in corporate branding. Loni, a patriotic citizen of Coca-City Herne Bay, has her world turned upside down when her husband brings a rebel into their home. From brushes with the law to journeying through the badlands, Loni must learn to rely on her wits to survive.
Cindy and Eric Go To Hell
After yet another day of the thankless grind, Cindy, Eric, and their loutish 'friend' Hans, are killed in a car accident. Cindy and Eric are sentenced to an eternity in hell because they didn't believe in God. Hans is accepted into Heaven because he asked for God's forgiveness a split second before impact. In Hell, Cindy and Eric quickly find it is the boredom that gets you, not the constant torture and misunderstood demons. So they decide to get out any way they can. Hans, meanwhile, is having his own problems. Where's the fun in having as many cars and TVs and as much beer and sex as you want? Cindy and Eric Go to Hell is a black comedy about love, torture and a demon named Raoul.
Crims
When Willy gets caught shoplifting his life is plunged into one of lies, deception and hiding from the pigs. During community service he meets Louis. Another doofus? Or a criminal mastermind? Either way, Willy and Louis are in for a bumpy ride.
Dance Troupe Supreme
An extremely fun and feisty play. Plenty to laugh at and about, AND think about - non-stop action and lots of quick and clever lines. A very welcome reprieve from the demands of everyday life - escapism and entertainment paired with some sizzling, saucy dance action!
Dinner Party Money
When struggling poet Stian is invited to a dinner party by a rich philanthropist, Winnie Mellor, he expects only opportunities. It soon becomes clear that Winnie's intentions are far from innocent as she begins using her power, influence and generous offerings to support Stian's artistic endeavours and, more importantly, ensure she gets what she wants from him. Along with the other guests - Garth the experimental film maker, Martin the stylish fashion designer and Kim the Philipino house maid - what we see is a cautionary tale about the dangers of lust and greed.
Disorder
An apocalyptic zombie adventure not for the faint of heart. The continued existence of New Zealanders is under threat by a blood-thirsty mob of the undead. Limbs fly as the remaining humans fight for survival, proving the zombies aren't the only ones with a taste for dismemberment – hold on to your seat and hope you make it out alive!
GAS
A comedy about 6 individuals who work in a gas station.
Hideous Progeny
Victor is a scientist. Victor wants to save the world. Victor engineers a new species. Victor creates a monster.
Hotel
Six short plays set in and around a hotel. Six tales about the lonely, the desperate and the feeble. Graeme, the cleaner, thinks he's being ousted by an influx of new, cheaper immigrants. Obsessive Arina's dream has come true when she wins a date with her pop star idol. Conservative Nancy has hired a prostitute as an anniversary gift for her husband. Highly strung concierge, Vicente, is pestered by a lonely Russian guest. Best friends from Manchester, Tannis and Lisa, almost break up. And receptionist, Annie, and bellboy, Joshua, fall in love, live out their relationship, and break up in the space of ten minutes.
Joseph and Mahina
Mihi was once a thriving dairy factory town. Yet since the factory's closure unemployment has soared, and the embittered populace has become directionless. Enter Joseph Nordhoy, an enthusiastic Christian Youth Group leader. Joseph is determined to put the pep and religious fervour back into the local teenagers. As his efforts continually fail he meets kindred spirit, Mahina, an angry teenager looking for an escape from her depressing hometown . . .
Little Blonde Hen
Nicole's getting married. Elvira's organised the party. Giselle's come for the booze. Lara's up for some party pashing. Rochelle needs some attention. Caroline isn't sure what's going on. And Megan is out for revenge. Little Blonde Hen, a biting comedy, follows a group of girlfriends as their evening disintegrates into drunken debauchery. Nicole's wedding is right around the corner and although everything appears on track, deep down there's some brooding. Abigail's Party meets The Women, Little Blonde Hen is a play about joy, despair and penis straws.
Loser
A black comedy, is the story of Glenwood High's ten year reunion. Following six ex-students through the build-up, eventual proceedings, and aftermath of the reunion, Loser is a tale of failed dreams, painful memories and a giant school-shaped cake. Up to 39 characters.
Love Bite
When Olivia returns from a work trip to China she believes she has discovered a gross crime against human rights. When she plans to return, however, a strange sickness takes hold. First a stomach ache. Then dizzy spells. And then one morning her fiancee, Tim, wakes up to find Olivia transformed into a snarling monster. The timid Tim must now do everything in his power to save the love of his life. On discovering the disease is highly infectious Tim must rely on his wits and savagery to succeed.
LUV
This black comedy follows four twenty-somethings and their desperate pursuits of love. Gemma Miller-Jones has been frequenting the local sports bar in the hopes of snagging a league-playing husband. When she spies the man of her dreams, Tobais Winstanley, she decides to pursue him no matter how degrading her behaviour has to be. Jacques White believes a reality television show, following him as he shops and goes to parties, will fulfil the attention and adoration he is so desperate for. When the producers of the show require more and more drama, Jacques accidentally organises the date from hell. Michelle Monroe is very close to achieving the perfect surgery-enhanced body. When no one will operate on her she visits a 'home surgery' and willingly slips under the knife. When she wakes, however, her disfigured body becomes her living nightmare. Ricki Bowater believes that the way to a girl’s heart is through excessive text messaging and breaking into their houses. When his overwhelming love pushes him to the edge of his sanity, though, Ricki makes one fatal mistake.
MAD
A farce based around the confused relationships in a mental facility.
Main Street
Cain is on the run. Junior is wants escape. In the hostile world of Huntly they band together and begin their slippery slide into crime.
Night
A group of desperate dreamers in dead-end jobs interact, fight, plot, get trapped, make plans and get themselves into incredibly tight and dangerous corners until everything boils into a crisis - and then come out the other end.
Psychopaths
Amy moved to New York to pursue her musical dreams, but things have soured after only four weeks. Life seems to be a painful struggle against the constant stream of bills, unsmiling faces and repeated rejection. And then, to top it all off, someone terrorises her in her home. They wore a white mask, they wanted her blood, and they will come again.
Sunday Roast
The Giles family is inviting you for dinner. The beast is fattened and ready for the slaughter. Father's on carving duty. Mother is on vegetables. Adversary daughters Courtney and Diane have dessert covered. Son-in-law Francois is in charge of looking good. The prodigal son, Anthony, just wants to be left alone. And Granddaughter Tamsin wants her desires satisfied. Now. And adopted son, Rupert? Well, he just wants everyone to have a good time.
Talk
Byron stutters. Leah brags. Sam reads minds. Chloe gossips. Ginnie yearns. Dylan commits crimes. Goff stumbles. Ava bluffs. Pepper spouts (crap) rhymes. TALK is a blackly comic nine-hander, a satire of modern living and our favourite pastime; talking.
The Christmas Monologues
It's Christmas morning and as the gifts are handed out you hear the stories of the many dysfunctions of the season. A series of twisted tales.
The Family Wilder
When Clive is employed as biographer for ruthless capitalist, Bill Wilder, he enters a world of decadence, deceit and disappointment. As he researches Bill’s life and gets to know his children and housekeeper, he soon realizes things are not as they first appear... Or is it Clive that’s not as he first appears...
The Feminine
Adam's peaceful existence is turned upside down when he is diagnosed with testicular cancer. But all is not lost. A new medical procedure promises to be the solution to his problems. Fifteen years later. Complications with the procedure. Adam wakes up from a coma, hidden in his fiancee's basement. But the world has changed. All the men have disappeared, and the world is run by women. As Adam hides his gender and dodges execution, he must solve the mystery and find some way to survive.
The Mall
The Mall, a black comedy, follows the inhabitants of the mall as they go about their days in their pristine, sterile environment. The two upper class world vision snobs, the warhammer role-playing nerds, the polynesian mall rats and the appliance salesman and his supervisor are blisffully unaware as they eat their processed meals, live off minimum wage and pettily fight amongst themselves, that a depressed cinema attendant and a vengeful Chinese foodcourt worker, are planning their demise.
The Needies
The Needies charts the downfall of three flatmates and their insatiable appetites for everything consumerist. The Needies toys with ideas of consumerism - how twenty-somethings have become accustomed to living their lives outside their means leading to amounting debts, which they tend to ignore. The play makes use of Thomas Sainsbury's fantastically dark and comedic sense of humour, using strong imaginative content to tease the audience.

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Thomas Sainsbury

Thomas Sainsbury s-a nascut la data de in , Noua Zeelandă.


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